INTIMACY

David has completed a short excerpt of the interview below. To watch the full interview head to our video page. We both enjoyed this interview so much we had to share :)

Sitah Sadhana – What is intimacy in relationships?

Sitah Sadhana – What is intimacy in relationships?

Fatah-Ji- From a yogic point of view the relationship can ever only be the outcome of one relationship which is the relationship with ourselves. The outside relationship is a reflection of the inner relationship. Intimacy with others can be a way to compensate for the intimacy we don’t have with ourselves- this is where relationships get messy. That is why we need to spend time with our deeper self – our soul. Kundalini is raising awareness of ourselves. We are a mandala of 10 bodies. One of those is the magnetic body which we can only relate to when we are sensitive. When your subtle self is activated, you then become aware of your magnetic field. You then understand how you are impacting the world and how the world is impacting you. If you don’t have consciousness of how you impact, there will be no intimacy.

“This awareness can only arise when you have intimacy with yourself.”

When we talk about intimacy with ourselves and awareness of our magnetic field the first thing that comes to mind is our relationship with our mother. This is because we build our first intimacy with our mother. Every relationship will be reflecting this one. In the womb and the first 40 days is the intimacy building. The first 7 years builds our own magnetic aura. However, for the first 7 years we are completely entangled with the magnetic field of the mother. So, depending on how intimate our mother was with herself will influence our own intimacy. Not to deny or judge the mother- she was always doing her best.

The whole process of yoga is to recognise this conditioning. It’s about being one with yourself and then you are one with all that is. This is the tantric frame we have in yoga. Without intimacy there is no life.

“With intimacy the physical body/ energy body/ and observer are all in one line. All 3 need to be aligned.”

You cannot have ecstasy until you embrace the feminine side. This is how we can be the observer but also not separate ourselves from the experience. I am in the show but also watching. The merging of the polarities where we never lose consciousness. This is real intimacy where you don’t lose the consciousness, but you also don’t lose the joy and bliss.

In the womb the mother is the sun for our moon side. At this point the light of the sun is filtered through the magnetic field of the mother. She is the feminine polarity, but she is the masculine in the womb.  After birth we have our own contact. The light of the sun starts to melt the patterns of the moon. So, the purpose of Kundalini yoga is to increase the fire within to melt the patterns.

It’s about recognising our moon side and how it has been imprinted by my mother so that the moon side can reflect the light of the sun without a filter- which is the light of my own soul within which can now shine, and we recognise it. This is what we call enlightenment.

To meditate on the divine mother when a woman is pregnant, she can change the whole life of the child. What you can move in these 9 months the child will not have to move. To change the world, we need to take care of the pregnant woman.

The energy of the divine mother was at the beginning and through all time and is the Adi Shakti.  We can radiate this without the filters.

We are not supposed to live a life of drama and suffering.  We will have karma, but we don’t need to have drama. In our own lives we think that when we show or make our drama that this is who we are but in reality, all we are doing is showing the world that we are outside of our own life. No one enjoys our drama, and we don’t either.

Sitah Sadhana- I have worked on my relationship with my mother for years. I know that I downloaded my patterns from my mother who was disconnected from her emotions. I have found that meditation on the divine mother has been my salvation.

Fatah-Ji - We will never disconnect from our biological mother- trying to do so makes the karma stronger. The minute you accept that you are exactly like your mother you have a chance. If you truly separate from your biological mother, you will die. This bond will never change. But that the nature of it, the prana that flows through it and the quality of that can change Go into the powerlessness. Go into that because that is where the Adi Shakti lies. You were powerless as a foetus and as a small child. If you are in contact with Adi Shakti, you are In contact with the flow of life and will not need to speak about the relationship to your mother. There is no end to processing the wounded feminine. …Once you recognise the powerlessness then the anger appears- this is another path. When you get out of the victim mentality then you recognise your own fire. This is when the feminine includes the masculine. This is the power of Kali. Kali is the fiercest part of the divine mother and when she Is re owning the divine masculine power as well.

“In a situation of abuse the real powerlessness arises and the fire is put down. ….. When this is acknowledged the fire comes and arises… A humungous power and this power is anger re-owning this fire and this is the healing. Then the self-respect comes back. This is owning your own fire.”

Sitah Sadhana – I have been in very abusive relationships …I feel that I have a responsibility with a man because as a woman I have more power, but I seem to create these same situations. I want to understand.

Fatah-Ji - You will see the light in a man, and you will see his subconscious but what will you choose to reflect. A woman is more intuitive and if you use the intuition to see the light in a man and reflect that you can expand it. A man needs the support of the feminine aspect and to be inspired by it. A spiritual path for a woman and a spiritual path for a man are different.

Sitah Sadhana – I have been diving into healing the wounded feminine. I find sometimes I never stop crying it’s been 4 years now. How do you heal the wounded feminine?

Fatah-Ji – There is an infinite pool of tears, the pain body is there in the magnetic body of the earth. It is distracting for your life, and it will be painful. If there is no joy in the tears it is not your path. The crying can be a distraction as the pool of suffering is another way to avoid another pain behind which is the fear of being angry and the fear of destruction “The pool of suffering will end when you stop wanting to heal yourself.” Adi Shakti will take care of the healing. This is not personal development. If you are the one claiming I am healing myself this is an ego trip, and the deeper healing will not be taking place. This is known as a spiritual ego.

“What we really want is the freedom from the need to heal ourselves and trust the universe with real intuition and unconditional love. Life is meant to be lived. Forget about the healing and embody the intuitive feminine.”